As mom said, it's not the last time...

Ann fell halfway down our stairs today.  I've been working with her on going down the steps - she can do it very well actually and she's been able to go up for months - making her turn around backwards and then going down, she's been able to go up for months now.  Being the spirit that she is, she thinks she should just be able to walk down them standing up.

So, I sat down against our laundry room doors (it's at the top of the steps next to her room) and started to put on my socks, as usually she'll try to pester me and sit down with me or tap on my head.  The hope was that she would sit down with me and then we would both turn around and crawl down backwards together (after all, if I walk down the stairs why shouldn't she so I'll crawl with her to convince her to do it this way)  No, my independent 12.5 month old lifted her leg, I saw it and couldn't stop it and took a little tumble, I swear there was a head stand in there too, came to a stop on the first stair that starts the turn (thank goodness for our 180 degree turn in our stairs, go figure, moving it it was the worst part) looked at me stunned and started to wail.

I get to her quickly, and the nurse in me takes over.  No bumps, no bruises, eyes are fine, arms are fine, legs are fine, abdomen is fine... the whole nursing assessment.  I take her the rest of the way down the stairs and give her a little cold pack shaped like a frog to distract her.  It actually worked too.  She stopped crying and just looked at me like "What was that about?"  At that point the mom in me returned and I started crying, to which she started all over again.  I stop crying and she stops.

So, I set her down and play nurse again, going to my medical books to read information that I think will help me (but I already know this information so that was just for reassurance) and Ann goes to playing. 

She's fine.  I know this.  But I still feel like a horrible mother.  It was going to happen at some point, I know this too.  Still though, I feel as if I failed her for a moment.

And then I went to the store and started something that I shouldn't - I bought her a book to make me feel better about it all.  Shame on me.

Til tomorrow.